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Let's press the button of awesome - Stolen memos found
- Thread starter Twinkle
- Start date
random_encounter
Educated
Sceptic said:
Is it? I thought it was a QTE that they added in there to make things more interesting and screwed up the loader detecting whether or not you had a 360 gamepad attached to your PC.Esquilax said:
If not, then I can't wait to see what Twinkle comes up with next.
Vaarna_Aarne
Notorious Internet Vandal
Yea, usually when a character has a hamfisted introduction like that to enforce on you the notion that they're AWESOME, it just makes me want to not use them at all.Brother None said:
Duke Prosper better start spouting utterly insane stuff at some point. HOPW ROEWUR NE
Twinkle
Liturgist
FELICIA'S STOLEN MEMOS 2
So these are the hunting grounds.
We just need to look for signs, and be careful. We get this over with, we get into the keep.
And that's where the jewel is?
That's where the jewel is.
Nya, scalies!
Wrong ones
Not a wyvern, definitely.
Do dragons and wyverns even mix? I don't think so.
So if we drop part of this in the right spot, we might lure a wyvern out to protect its territory?
Good thought! Do that!
Champion of Kirkwall? Fancy title.
It was earned.
So do you get a stipend? They let you rule the city?
Not yet.
Moving south Hawke discovered a small glade with suspicious looking altar in the middle.
That altar is very old. And creepy. I wouldn't touch it.
And I would.
That's what DirectX11 is being used for.
That disturbed some ugly monster ass. Of course, the escape route had been cut off.
The bad thing is that he constantly teleported in reinforcements. Hawke was focused on the main bad guy while girls were fending off regular mooks.
Also, Felicia's performance in the fight was somewhat disappointing.
Indeed, indeed. Not too far away there was a pool of blood that might have belonged to something not quite human.
A lot of blood. Would that be prey or from a wyvern itself?
I heard they fight for dominance. Can't be gentle.
Maybe we can use some to draw out rivals.
Added to what we have already, is it enough to draw one out of hiding?
I'd say so. A little one. Probably all we need.
In the right spot... no doubt.
Of course, there were the competing hunters.
Have you seen a pair of coursers? I've been calling and calling, but it is no use.
Nicodemus should know better, but Sylvain never had an ounce of sense in his head.
I have no idea who or what you're talking about.
My dogs, monsieur! What did you think I meant?
They took off after a stag, and the Maker only knows where they've gotten to now.
Please, you must help me find them.
If I see your dogs, I'll let you know.
May Andraste guide you.
Champion of Turdwall, looking for the lost dogs on behest of some minor Orlesian noble. Awesome.
The other glory seekers were even worse, demonstrating a level of intelligence on par with BioWare Social regulars.
Only fools taunt creatures this size.
Just ignore them.
So this is the first ingredient for the anti-wyvern antidote.
While picking the thing Hawke overheard pleasured low growling coming from behind the mountain.
Is that... wyverns mating?
Could we mimic that?
No! Oh, the sound. Right, yes, I can try that.
Too straightforward. Stay classy, Dg.
Yay, another ingredient.
Two hunters tried to chase what they thought to be a wyvern to a nearby cave. It didn't end well.
Holy shit, it's nice to see they've backported goblins from NWN.
Ghasts are your typical moles familiar from modern borefare shooters. They pop from holes to mask respawning and barrage the party with their pea guns. However, due to the fact that shots never miss in DA2 they are more of a challenge that their looks would lead you believe.
What in Andraste's name were those?
Ghasts. Cave creatures. They don't come out on the surface much, however.
Behind the ghast territory Hawke found a survivor.
Oh, Blessed Andrate, thank you! I thought I'd die out here! I've been trapped here since last night!
Truth.
There are wyverns out here. By all rights, you should be dead.
Believe me, I know! I've been praying for deliverance for the last four hours!
Truth told, I'm not looking for the wyvern. I'm a scholar from Cumberland, researching on Avvar cult that once lived here.
They worshipped the Lady of the Skies to the exclusion of all other gods. I'm searching for their shrine.
I think I've been to your shrine. There were nothing but angry spirits at the site.
Nothing else? Pity. I had hoped... ah well.
The rumors say they were driven from their last refuge. They left a great treasure in the goddess's keeping.
But the mountain has defeated me. Please, take my research and see if you can do anything with it.
I will try to make it to camp. Good luck to you, serah.
Don't you think, wyvern is a strange word? It's like a cross between a wife and a cistern.
The sooner we get the hunt over with, the sooner we'll be at the chateau to finish this.
So Hawke backtracked all the way to the place where he defeated the sky demon.
That must the altar that weird old guy mentioned.
What do his notes say?
Uh... touch that, I guess.
Awesome. A huge chest appeared out of nowhere. What this, a Fable Age?!
We cleared the area, time to return to our quest.
Just how long has this wyvern hunt been going on?
It's an annual tradition the Montforts began to keep the population down. They breed quickly.
And the Orlesian nobility is only too happy to help out?
It's a game. The Montforts are close to the empress, so anything that pleases them is worth pursuing.
Plus, you should really try the aquae lucidius. You'll be seeing purple dragons in the sky for days.
No thanks, I'd rather remain effective.
Guess the first thing I saw on the new location.
Nobody step in that!
There you go, Hawke. It seems we're on the trail.
Wonderful.
Wonderful?! SHIT!
Happy to get out of the Deep Roads for a while?
Not especially.
I'm sure it's nice for you. These are your kind of people.
No, that wasn't fair. I'm... I'm sorry. That was about me.
I know. And it wasn't fair for you either.
It isn't fair for me there is still no romance mod, ffs.
Oh! A wyvern kill? Some kind of... halla or something?
That... could be a tunic.
Don't know, don't care, it's bait they liked for some reason.
Wyvern present doesn't scare ghasts away, though. Also, it seems some of them are capable of doing magic, which is quite odd.
Bloody things.
I think that's the last of them. For now.
How many are there usually?
A ghastling nest can often be a hundred or more. Just be thankful we're not underground.
Not so subtle hint where future adventures will lead us to.
Watch out. There may be ghasts.
From a hole.
Cave, technically.
Fakking obnoxious moles, I begin hating them.
Rarely, the game is capable of producing a beautiful view. Hawke just isn't a poetic nature.
Oh, look. Something to drown in.
The Montfort family inherited this mountain from a clan of Neverarran dragon-hunters.
Well, maybe inherited is the wrong word. What do you call it when you kill someone in order to get all their stuff?
Tuesday.
Ah, the last ingredient for the healing salve.
That's everything the old huntmaster said we needed for an antidote.
I don't think there's enough for a person, though. Maybe we can find a use for it.
Hai, doggie!
Look! I think he wants us to follow him!
Mind the ghasts.
Right. That's normal.
The dog led Hawke to his dying comrade.
Oh no... poor thing.
Wyvern poison. I'm almost certain. Poor thing.
Wasting precious salve on a stupid furry four legged pile of meat? No fucking way.
I'll put him out of his misery.
You... think we should tell his owner?
The enraged dog owner intercepted Hawke on the way back.
What did you do to Nicodemus? I've never seen Sylvain so worked up before.
The dog was poisoned. I put him out of his misery.
You killed my champion hound? I demand satisfaction!
So that's what you get for trying to help people.
Right track it is. Shit everywhere.
You know, I'm not sure I want to see the creature that made that.
Ugh. Well, at least we're getting closer.
Now my dear readers, this is an important lesson to be learned here: don't click on everything that looks like a lootable item. It may end up being...
Sighs Looking for clues.
Oh, for Andraste's sake! You didn't do that on purpose, did you?
Oooh, nug bones. I wonder if a nug call would help attract a wyvern.
You know a nug call?
You go elbow-deep in wyvern shit and I'm the weird one?
We must have enough to bait a trap now.
In the right spot... no doubt.
...SHIT. If there is one and only screenshot to sum up Dragon Age 2 - this is it, without any doubt.
It's SHIT.
This is the place.
Well, the trail suggests wyverns just love this place to bits. If we were going to find one, it'd be here.
Yes, I think this would be the place to find a wyvern. And room enough to kill the thing without getting sat on.
They're not stupid, though. We'll need some really good bait.
Lay it all out. I'm bring the duke a trophy to talk about.
Yes! I mean, if you're sure.
Let's get to it. We've got a lot of stuff to lay out, for starters.
Right, now the blood.
I feel your disgust, bro Hawke.
What? The prey needs to be moving. Doesn't it?
Okay, I'll do the sound. You get ready.
Don't look at me while I do this.
Was that... good?
You want to do it? Didn't think so.
Words can't describe this. I'm just going to leave it here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LdlDNdw0aTE
After hearing it frankly I can't blame wyvern for the murderous intent.
Ignore it, wyvern's poison is nearly harmless.
On the other hand their charge attack is not. It's a guaranteed "death" for non-warriors.
After dancing around the battlefield for 5 minutes beastie's health finally went to zero.
Three powerful strikes and the monster lies defeated.
It wasn't over yet, for Hawke's victory had upset some faggy Orlesian noble with huge ego.
Well if it isn't the Fereldan turnip.
They say you are a champion of some backwater city in the east. Quite an achievement, I'm sure.
I suggest you run along with your servants while you have the chance. This wyvern was mine to kill, not yours.
Mine, mine, mine!
I paid good coin to be the one who wins the contest! It was my turn!
You had your chance, Orlesian, and you failed.
You dare talk to me in such a fashion!
You do realize Hawke can beat you like a rented mule, with both hands tied behind his back?
More insolence! From a knife-ear this time!
I can take no more of this. Kill them all. We can say the wyvern was too much for them.
They had no honor.
Only Duke's intervention delayed the inevitable.
Now what is going on here?
Prosper! This bloody bastard tried to steal my rightful kill!
Now is that any way to speak of the Champion of Kirkwall, Baron?
This is your fault for inviting a stinking turnip in the first place! Your mother would be ashamed!
Laughs Says the man whose mother has slept with half of Val Chevin.
My apologies. Arlange has always been a cheat. What would you have done with him?
You're not suggesting...
Why not? You believe Arlange would have stopped short of murder, given the chance?
Oh, yes.
There's only one price for losing.
And such a rude thing for a guest to do.
Prosper nodded to his savage bodyguard.
You... can't be serious? You would let this filthy turnip tell you... Screams
Tsk.
Congratulations on finding the wyvern. It looks like a fine one, indeed!
There will be a celebration in the chateau courtyard. Do attend when you're ready.
Stupid fool. It didn't need to come to that.
The baron? He was asking for it.
I know.
He wasn't very nice, was he? Turnips are terrible vegetables.
Well, he didn't have to be rude.
We should go to the chateau. Time to practice your table conversation.
The hunt was over.
Nya, scalies!
Wrong ones
Moving south Hawke discovered a small glade with suspicious looking altar in the middle.
And I would.
That's what DirectX11 is being used for.
That disturbed some ugly monster ass. Of course, the escape route had been cut off.
The bad thing is that he constantly teleported in reinforcements. Hawke was focused on the main bad guy while girls were fending off regular mooks.
Also, Felicia's performance in the fight was somewhat disappointing.
Indeed, indeed. Not too far away there was a pool of blood that might have belonged to something not quite human.
Of course, there were the competing hunters.
Champion of Turdwall, looking for the lost dogs on behest of some minor Orlesian noble. Awesome.
The other glory seekers were even worse, demonstrating a level of intelligence on par with BioWare Social regulars.
So this is the first ingredient for the anti-wyvern antidote.
While picking the thing Hawke overheard pleasured low growling coming from behind the mountain.
Too straightforward. Stay classy, Dg.
Yay, another ingredient.
Two hunters tried to chase what they thought to be a wyvern to a nearby cave. It didn't end well.
Holy shit, it's nice to see they've backported goblins from NWN.
Ghasts are your typical moles familiar from modern borefare shooters. They pop from holes to mask respawning and barrage the party with their pea guns. However, due to the fact that shots never miss in DA2 they are more of a challenge that their looks would lead you believe.
Behind the ghast territory Hawke found a survivor.
Truth.
So Hawke backtracked all the way to the place where he defeated the sky demon.
Uh... touch that, I guess.
Awesome. A huge chest appeared out of nowhere. What this, a Fable Age?!
We cleared the area, time to return to our quest.
Guess the first thing I saw on the new location.
Wonderful?! SHIT!
It isn't fair for me there is still no romance mod, ffs.
Wyvern present doesn't scare ghasts away, though. Also, it seems some of them are capable of doing magic, which is quite odd.
Not so subtle hint where future adventures will lead us to.
Fakking obnoxious moles, I begin hating them.
Rarely, the game is capable of producing a beautiful view. Hawke just isn't a poetic nature.
Ah, the last ingredient for the healing salve.
Hai, doggie!
The dog led Hawke to his dying comrade.
Wasting precious salve on a stupid furry four legged pile of meat? No fucking way.
The enraged dog owner intercepted Hawke on the way back.
So that's what you get for trying to help people.
Right track it is. Shit everywhere.
Now my dear readers, this is an important lesson to be learned here: don't click on everything that looks like a lootable item. It may end up being...
...SHIT. If there is one and only screenshot to sum up Dragon Age 2 - this is it, without any doubt.
It's SHIT.
This is the place.
I feel your disgust, bro Hawke.
Words can't describe this. I'm just going to leave it here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LdlDNdw0aTE
After hearing it frankly I can't blame wyvern for the murderous intent.
Ignore it, wyvern's poison is nearly harmless.
On the other hand their charge attack is not. It's a guaranteed "death" for non-warriors.
After dancing around the battlefield for 5 minutes beastie's health finally went to zero.
Three powerful strikes and the monster lies defeated.
It wasn't over yet, for Hawke's victory had upset some faggy Orlesian noble with huge ego.
They had no honor.
Only Duke's intervention delayed the inevitable.
Oh, yes.
Prosper nodded to his savage bodyguard.
The hunt was over.
DarthBehemoth
Learned
god this DLC just makes me want to hurt myself, alot.But aside from that, carry on...
racofer
Thread Incliner
racofer
Thread Incliner
abnaxus said:
GAIDER DECIDES WHAT DEAD REALLY MEANS!!
Krash
Arcane
Wow, I expected the dialogue to be at least on par with the shittier parts of BG2, but this is like a very low budged fantasy b series.
Brother None
inXile Entertainment
- Joined
- Jul 11, 2004
- Messages
- 5,673
Oh man.
Felicia Day should sue the hell out of the BioWare. There's no way her career can recover from this.
Felicia Day should sue the hell out of the BioWare. There's no way her career can recover from this.
Reptilian Shapeshifter
Educated
- Joined
- Feb 19, 2011
- Messages
- 385
Another classic: "Big hats are never good!"
More like 'bating the biotards.
Quality work here:
More like 'bating the biotards.
Quality work here:
Could we mimic that?
No! Oh, the sound. Right, yes, I can try that.
:facepalm:
Well, maybe inherited is the wrong word. What do you call it when you kill someone in order to get all their stuff?
He wasn't very nice, was he? Turnips are terrible vegetables.
Boy, this DLC's writing is even worse than ArcaniA's. DGaider, you've exceeded my expectations.
FFS.
mysterious-stranger
Educated
racofer said:abnaxus said:
GAIDER DECIDES WHAT DEAD REALLY MEANS!!
That is the worst thing I've ever read. Ever
meanwhileInPoland
Arcane
- Joined
- Feb 13, 2011
- Messages
- 2,234
lightbane said:Not only wyverns were supposed to be extinct, but dragons too (which wyverns are a subspecies anyway), however...
Whenever someone talks about bad writing, a link to this lp should be posted.
fuck yes
dragons were supposed to be extinct so in a game called dragon age you should never face a fucking dragon.
ffs kodeks you try fucking too hard sometimes
Vaarna_Aarne
Notorious Internet Vandal
Not to mention the shit is pretty shitty as well.Erebus said:
This man has pressed a button and something awesome is currently happening.
circ
Arcane
WHAT THE FUCK?Crooked Bee said:
YOU'VE ACTUALLY OUTDONE FELICITATE ME. CONGRATULATIONS.
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