Let's play.... ToEE with Co8

[Ulminati]

Part 3: Sloggin' thru the Bog
(My apologies in advance for the screenshot-heavy dialogues. I'll fix up a more elegant solution for the next update)

You know what? I just had a brilliant idea. Let's not explore this moathouse yet. I'm sure someone in that backwater village can come up with something more suited to my strategic magnificense!

Will we at least stay long enough to get a damned ale this time? My throat is parched

I doubt it. Adventure waits for no man!

Right. Let's go track down this old fart and see what the fuss is all about

Get to the point already!

I know this is probably futile to suggest, but if we bought some healing potions before we --

Onwards to glory!

Why must you always sign us up for quests in places that stink, Ulminati?

Ah, shut up and take it like a man!

What does anal intercourse have to do with walking through a bog?

....Backing away now.

What trickery is this!? They vanished in a flash of light!

They must've been illusions of some sort. They left no tracks in the mud.

Ha! Just goes to prove whatever's out there is scared of us! This will be a breeze!

INCOMING!

That was surprisingly one-sided

Have some faith in my superiour tactics already. Isn't faith what you godfreaks are all about?

Come and take a look at this, guys. The kobolds came from this cavern

Hmph. Another illusion. I have no patience for this hide-and-seek. Come out, undead spectre, and be done with it already!

Look, everyone! Kobold tracks in the dirt. they're probably dug in at the end of this corridor. Should we try to find another way around?

Nah. CHARGE!

Some day, you must show me some of those "sophisticated tactics" you claim to know

Damn, you were right boss. We steamrolled those kobolds. Today, nothing can stop us!

That's the spirit! You naysayers could learn a thing or two from Nickless.

A gnoll, a kobold, a goblin and some undead... That has to be the strangest group of monsters I ever heard of. Wonder what drove them together

Fear not, fair maiden sweetcheeks! I will defend your chastity until tonight!

:groan:

We're getting overwhelmed! Strangelove! Can't you... holy them away or something?!

(what does he think this is? Dial-a-diety?)

Sweet mother of mercy! the lich exploded into a cloud of dust!

Their leader is down! Press the advantage!

Nickless! Duck!

Ouch.

Oh man... I don't think Nickless was part of your plan after all, boss

Strangelove. Can't you... holy him together or something?

Nay, lad. Him being hole-y is the problem to begin with.

(At least I can stop sleeping with my arse against a wall)

...

Er... ALAS, poor Nickless! Our dear friend shall be, um, sorely missed!

Ding! Gratz!

RIP, BROther Nickless. Killed by a spiked club to the face, under the Welkwood bog.

...All right, mourning time's over. Let's strip him and head back to town to recruit someone to fill his shoes.

Your greif over the loss of a friend is truly touching, you know.

*ahem* If I may have everyone's attention for a moment! We're looking for a mighty adventurer to join our stalwart band. Fame, glory and riches surely await in short order!

If it please thee, I am Magister Mrowakus, mighty mage of macabre mysteries. At thine service.

Sounds golden. Pack your stuff and get in line. We're headed back to loot the bog.

Perchance it pleases thee to let me partake in some paltry pay prior to walking this perilous path? Avaricious adversaries abscoded with my adventuring articles.

...

Does any of you have the faintest clue what he's talking about?

Tell you what. We'll get you a sling and some bullets, but in return, you need to start speaking like a normal person. If we have to wait for you to construct contrived sentences like that, we'll never get anywhere.

Deal.

Speaking of selling crap, I fel like I've passed some arbitrary experience treshold. Let's make a quick detour to the moathouse and our good, dead friend spidey and crack open that chest.

Hallelujah, it's a fucking miracle. Finally some actual loot!

Indeed. that reminds me we never did check out what was behind door number 2 in the lich'es lair.

Incredible. My friends, you seem to posess an extrodinary talent for finding lost-forgotten treasures. And with not a single adversary to impede our progress, too!

...

What?

We head upstairs, and shortly thereafter goblins come running from pretty much every direction

There's too many of them! we can't hold them!

Allow me. *ahem* r'lyeh mpguni swakka AndhairaX!

that last word made all the goblins fall asleep!

Coup de Grace for everyone!

Another 2 goblin encounters end prematurely thanks to awesome sleep spells, and we decide to head back to collect our reward for killing 'Lord Mathel'

Tune in next time fore Moar Moathouse Madness!

 

[Darth Roxor]

I find it very lovely how you're actively working against us by putting all kinds of shit loot in our packs for maximum encumbrance.

 

[Grunker]

First blood! Here's to many more! *Cheers*

 

[Merkwürdigliebe]

We're getting overwhelmed! Strangelove! Can't you... holy them away or something?!

(what does he think this is? Dial-a-diety?)

Sweet mother of mercy! the lich exploded into a cloud of dust!

Thats some insane turn undead for a level 1 cleric right there. And If we have learned anything from Paco's LP it is that the cleric always survives. :D

 

[Ulminati]

I find it very lovely how you're actively working against us by putting all kinds of shit loot in our packs for maximum encumbrance.

It was only lightly encumbered.

Besides, since we have so many low(ish) str members, we can barely haul any loot before encumberance hits.

Not to worry, I don't intend to let Sir Roxor die. He's a bonafide killing machine at the moment, frequently killing 2 enemies per turn due to that thing Cleave is talking about.

 

[Dragula]

While I realise the crowd wants death, do you actually TRY to keep your party alive, and if you could have kept all the starting guys alive to the end game, would you?

 

[Ulminati]

I try to keep everyone alive, of course. That being said, once we're past the moathouse (and while we were in the bog), I have no idea what to expect since I haven't played it before. I fully expect people to get killed due to bad decisionmaking on my part, but I'm not actively trying to get anyone killed.

Heck, if I had to choose a party member to get croaked last fight, it would've been Snozzy (no offense ). Nickless and Roxor are the only members of our party who can reliably hit enemies at the moment, thanks to the -4 firing into melee penalty for archers. It'll get better with precise shot at level 3, but it feels a long way off.

That said, I do go into encounters with a few HP missing and half the spells spent. If I wanted to be popamole about this, we'd retreat to the moathouse tower to rest 8 hours after every encounter. But we're too BRO to rely on cheap tactics like that.

Thats some insane turn undead for a level 1 cleric right there. And If we have learned anything from Paco's LP it is that the cleric always survives. :D

Yeah. It was a desperation move on my part. Seeing as turn undead is modified by charisma (of which your cleric has none), I wasn't expecting it to do more than maybe look pretty. By a stroke of dumb luck, you managed to destroy the undead leader and deal a respectable amount of damage to the skeleton gnoll. If you hadn't at that point, we would probably have lost a party member or two more.

 

[Merkwürdigliebe]

I try to keep everyone alive, of course. That being said, once we're past the moathouse (and while we were in the bog), I have no idea what to expect since I haven't played it before. I fully expect people to get killed due to bad decisionmaking on my part, but I'm not actively trying to get anyone killed.

Heck, if I had to choose a party member to get croaked last fight, it would've been Snozzy (no offense ). Nickless and Roxor are the only members of our party who can reliably hit enemies at the moment, thanks to the -4 firing into melee penalty for archers. It'll get better with precise shot at level 3, but it feels a long way off.

That said, I do go into encounters with a few HP missing and half the spells spent. If I wanted to be popamole about this, we'd retreat to the moathouse tower to rest 8 hours after every encounter. But we're too BRO to rely on cheap tactics like that.

Thats some insane turn undead for a level 1 cleric right there. And If we have learned anything from Paco's LP it is that the cleric always survives. :D

Yeah. It was a desperation move on my part. Seeing as turn undead is modified by charisma (of which your cleric has none), I wasn't expecting it to do more than maybe look pretty. By a stroke of dumb luck, you managed to destroy the undead leader and deal a respectable amount of damage to the skeleton gnoll. If you hadn't at that point, we would probably have lost a party member or two more.

Ha the more you know, I have basically no knowledge of 3d:ed, I thought the clerics level still was the modifier for turn undead. I just hope wisdom is still the number one stat for clerics or the mighty Strangelove might end up gimped.

 

[Ulminati]

Speaking of encumberance. I just loaded up the game again to take another crack at the moathouse. Strangelove is lightly encumbered, carrying no items, and wearing a suit of chainmail, a shield and a mace. It takes NOTHING to get people lightly encumbered in this game

 

[Darth Roxor]

Shuffle the items a bit and see if anything happens. When I played last time there was this bug-like thing that made encumbrance not go away properly.

 

[Mrowak]

Allow me. *ahem* r'lyeh mpguni swakka AndhairaX!

 

[Ulminati]

Moathouse is still being cleaned. The log book informs me that Mrowakus has managed an impressive 29 consecutive misses with his sling

Roxorowski is up to 27 killing blows. He's a murder machine!

[edit]

By the way. We could totally do with more clerics

 

[Ulminati]

Part 4: Moathouse Extravaganza the First

Look, Ulminati, we can't go on like this. I can only cast so many spells in a day. We'll need a wand of healing, some potions or some scrolls if we're going to survive this.

Ok, ok! Enough already! We'll pay the temple a visit

72 gold pieces!? Fuck you and fuck your god! This is racketeering!

Perchances the mages at the tower to the ast have some more reasonably priced items for us to procure?

I guess we'll find out. Blood-sucking godlover scum. See if I'll ever ask them to raise someone from the dead.

Signing us up for another quest now?

Nah. Just telling the bugger what he wants to hear in the hopes he'll lower his prices.

Splendid! Scrolls of arcane lore! If we purchase these, I will be able to pierce the secrets that binds the universe together, unleashing torrents of arcane power upon all who would impede our progress!

Those are too bloody expensive. You'll just have to reread some scrolls you've already read instead!

Can we at least stay in the inn for a change? I spoke with the innkeeper, and his rooms are really quite cheap

What have you against poor Spidey at chateau leaky tower? You should be ashamed of yourselves.

(A bath! A bath! My kingdom for a bath!)

Some day, your penny-pinching is going to get us all killed.

And so our brave heroes went back to rest in the tower conveniently close to the moathouse

I've a good feeling about this. Here's the plan: Roxorowski, you kick down the door. Mrowakus, use that spell of yours to make whatever's in there fall asleep. Me and Snozzy will pepper them with arrows and Strangelove can keep Roxorowskis insides from becoming his outsides.

You mean the Dread Thread of AndhairaX?

ZZzzzzzzZZzZzZZzzz....

Democrats vs Republicans! Which is better and why? Discuss!

Come one, come all! 2 for 1 special at Roxorowskis Carnival of whoopass! It's that thing Cleave is talking about!

Nice job everyone. Now let's slit their throats while they're still asleep!

Loot is found, there is much rejoycing.

I think I found a secret door over here! Let's go this way!

Holy fuck, that's a big Ogre! ...Indeed, I think he's so big he won't be able to squeeze through this door to reach us

...this feels incredibly cheap.

Dwarves cannot into brilliant strategy. Feel free to go in there and get one-shotted if you like

Excellent! another foe defeated by our solid ranged superiority!

"our"? I didn't see you doing all that much that fight.

Lies! I sent a supreme barrage of deadly pellets hurling towards our foe!

Ding! Gratz!

The ogre had a magic cloak and a bunch of copper

She totally wants me!

Coming up next: More Moathouse Madness

 

[chzr]

i was little bored so i did some research and here you have my char + development updated (in b4 why bother it won't survive moar then 1 update)

same portrait

chzr
female
half-elf

ranger 1 lvl, then 8 fighter levels, rest ranger levels

neutral good
no deity

STR 12
DEX 18 (all points here)
CON 8
INT 8
WIS 12
CHA 14

starting skills: survival, spot, listen, hide, move silently
increase only spot, listen and survival with both fighter and ranger levels

feats:
1: point blank shot, racial en. human
2: precise shot
3: weap. foc. longbow, imp. initiative
5: weap. spec. longbow
6: far shot
7: dodge
9: great. weap. foc. longbow, imp. crit. longbow
10: archery spec.
12: mobility
13: rac. en: elf +2 (human +4)
15: shot on the run

also,

 

[Ulminati]

You realize 8 str will give you a damage penalty with longbows as well, right? And that you're going to be unable to carry a bow, a quiver of arrows and a suit of armor without being encumbered and losing dex modifier to AC.

I've the rest of the moathouse cleared, but the update'll have to wait until next page so we don't drown in screenshots.

 

[chzr]

You realize 8 str will give you a damage penalty with longbows as well, right? And that you're going to be unable to carry a bow, a quiver of arrows and a suit of armor without being encumbered and losing dex modifier to AC.

I've the rest of the moathouse cleared, but the update'll have to wait until next page so we don't drown in screenshots.

gah, switch the con and str then i guess. the penalty applies only to negative str amirite?

 

[chzr]

also, i want an update so i'll bump it myself if i have to

 

[chzr]

also, i want an update so i'll bump it myself if i have to

just sayin'

 

[Gondolin]

Onward to the next update! What could go wrong?

 

[Darth Roxor]

Come one, come all to our travelling circus;
Cast-off your cares for the painted parade.
Whirl down the wynd like dervish-berserkers;
If life hands us lemons; we'll make lemonade.




Onwards, let us turn the tide with an overwhelming minority.

 

[chzr]

Onward to the next update!

 

[chzr]

Onward to the next update!

 

[chzr]

Onward to the next update!

 

[chzr]

Onward to the next update!

 

[chzr]

Onward to the next update!