There's no such thing as....

[Crispy]

Name something in fantasy or any other genre that is conducive to roleplaying that may theoretically exist, but that you never actually see.

For example, there's no such thing as a dwarven bard. I think this might be because their huge beards prevent them from properly playing wind instruments and their fat fingers can't properly pluck the strings of lutes, etc. Dwarves aren't usually happy enough to make a living serenading crowds in taverns, either.

Bonus points if your idea is especially creative or funny.

 

[Maxie]

there's no such thing as an isometric camera angle

 

[Gargaune]

... a trustworthy elf.

Spoiler

 

[Rephyrnomicon]

... a good RPG made after 2002.

 

[Cryomancer]

There's no such thing as "lawful barbarians"

 

[Ryzer]

There is no such thing as "RPG" in Disco Elysium.

 

[buffalo bill]

their fat fingers

they're just big boned

 

[Valdetiosi]

There's no such thing as RNG.
What, your character decides to argue with bandit "oh hey lads lets throw some dices, the one who gets bigger number gets to slice other one".

 

[Serus]

There's no such thing as "lawful barbarians"

We need to ask our resident Codex barbarian first.

 

[Infinitron]

Name something in fantasy or any other genre that is conducive to roleplaying that may theoretically exist, but that you never actually see.

Riding horses in an isometric medieval fantasy RPG, of course.

(okay, almost never)

 

[octavius]

There's no such thing as RNG.
What, your character decides to argue with bandit "oh hey lads lets throw some dices, the one who gets bigger number gets to slice other one".

RNG simulates a probabilistic universe.
And it's not your character throwing the dice.

 

[Late Bloomer]

A Gnomish Warrior. At best they could be some kind of rogue. But the idea of gnome warriors standing guard, with nothing but their swords and shields... Maybe if an army of mice or rats was making a move on their ancestral homeland sure, otherwise they wouldnt stand a chance and they would look ridiculous to boot

 

[Skinwalker]

There should be no such thing as cosmopolitan medieval-era fantasy settings, where whites, chinks, nigs, nogs, pajeets, abdools, trannies, etc. just walk around like there's nothing odd about it.

 

[Nazrim Eldrak]

1. A beautiful elf maid who falls in love with a small ooze, because she finds it adorable.
2. A death knight riding an innocent unicorn
3. A dryad who starts cutting down her tree because she thinks it's ugly
4. A paladin who cracks good jokes

 

[Chippy]

There's no such thing as...stealth working in IWD2.

 

[Serus]

Name something in fantasy or any other genre that is conducive to roleplaying that may theoretically exist, but that you never actually see.

Riding horses in an isometric medieval fantasy RPG.

(okay, almost never)

So true and so sad at the same time.

 

[Kruyurk]

There is no such thing as clean as an elven arse.

 

[Valdetiosi]

And it's not your character throwing the dice.

I wanna believe

 

[Cryomancer]

Lawful or good necromancers.

 

[Dorateen]

Crispy

Dwarven bards are more like the Old Norse skalds. Lorekeepers writing poetic sagas to pass on from one generation to another. Also, see Thorin & Company from The Hobbit, Far Over the Misty Mountains Cold.

 

[Valdetiosi]

Might be exclusive, but there's no such thing as potion drinking in JRPGs. The concept of ingesting fluids out of vials is foreign there, and people decide to sprinkle the contents all over people.

And then in Dragon's Age you drink poultices instead applying them to wounds...

 

[Skinwalker]

Also, there is no such thing as a dwarven band. Probably because a rock-band composed solely of dwarves would look ridiculous and everyone would laugh at them.

 

[Dorateen]

a rock-band composed solely of dwarves would look ridiculous

 

[Zlaja]

There's no such thing as a dwarven foot-fetischist, because all dwarven females have just as ugly hairy feet as male dwarves.

 

[Generic-Giant-Spider]

Also, there is no such thing as a dwarven band. Probably because a rock-band composed solely of dwarves would look ridiculous and everyone would laugh at them.

Good one Liberal. Really riveting stuff you're contributing here.