Seriously, a new chapter? My excitement is suddenly waning. Is this going to be a long dungeon crawl?
That depends.
On what?
What you mean by 'dungeon' and 'crawl'.
So... how did you leave Balthazar's prison without anyone noticing and set everything up so fast here?
It is better not to ask such questions, as everyone who played Diablo III can attest.
Picking up garbage after me? Cute.
I never asked for this.
Oh, wow. Imoen.
And for a moment there I was worried it would be something with actual teeth, like a kobold, maybe.
I never thought I would hear someone say the phrase 'merely coaxing forth your essence'.
Yeah, I am not sure it even means anything.
Aaaaaaand she's dead. Took less time than I expected.
About three seconds less than we expected, to be exact.
Well, I wasn't too keen on a having a conversation with you either.
Melissan vanishes in a puff of smoke, as badly-written villains usually do.
Actually it was a flash of light, but the point stands.
Even Irenicus' writing sucks now.
I do not think I am even needed for this conversation.
Oh yeah, because I will have any problem beating you now, Bodhi, unlike the dozen previous times we fought...
Well, you can TRY.
Imoen turns into a Slayer.
I thought she just forgot to put her morning make-up on.
Wait, where did these solars come from?
OMGWTFISGOING-
Death Count: 409
Loading.
Did we underestimate the threat a bit?
Maybe just a little.
Let's see how they deal with spell trap and stone skin.
We obviously skip the boring dialogue bit.
Bring it on, bitches!
Death Count: 410
Load game.
Looks like we're going to need more spells than that.
Are you sure this will be enough?
But it might!
Fuck you.
Horrid wilting incoming!
Moving out!
Death Count: 411
Load.
Well, at least I moved from the initial spot.
We are going to need more magic resistance.
Fabulous.
Let us hope 80%, on top of protective spells, is enough.
Well, I did not immediately die, so we've got some progress!
Bodhi is closing in like a rabid fangirl on Robert Pattinson.
Twilight jokes in 2016.
Be glad you did not delay this even more.
And there goes our spell protection.
Ready... Steady...
Why THE FUCK is she immune to my attacks?
That is a decent question.
Good thing I dusted off the good ol' death counter.
Death Count: 412
LG.
I can't win if I can't hurt them.
It is probably best if we limit ourselves to +4 and better weapons from now on.
Alright, TIME OUT!
Since I have a moment, let's use it to the best of my ability.
You know, that is also always my goal, but then I waste countless hours online, looking for price deals on games which I will not even play later.
But, that IS the best of your ability, so everything checks.
First, a playmate for Irenicus, and I don't mean the Playboy type.
DEVOUR!
I doubt this will even do anything, but whatever.
Can you even cast Projected Image if you already have a Simulacrum?
I don't think I've ever cast projected image. Also, for some reason that fallen solar is giving Bodhi the finger.
HATRED!
Yeah, that would be my guess too.
Hey, catch!
And one more!
Watch out for falling comets.
As for you, Imoen...
Fuck off!
Nice timing with the vorpal hit and comet there.
Let me take care of Irenicus while Bodhi and solar are busy with each other.
I would appreciate a nice vorpal hit now...
...But multiple crits in a row are fine too!
And since I do not want to get too close to those bloodthirsty solars, let's use a tool I saved for exactly such an occasion.
And he's gone. Magic!
Okay, I am ready to face the death-angels.
Mwahahahahaha!
I am invincible!
Can't hurt me! What'cha gonna do now, owl-boy... uh, girl?
Why, yes, I will jump off this ledge into a bottomless pit. What a great suggestion!
Death Count: 413
Game -> Load.
Well, they've found a hole in my nigh-impervious defense.
Let us skip a bit to the part where we horrid-wilting carpet-bomb everyone.
This part is one of my favorites!
We try to lure some of them out, and get a partial success.
Ouch! Would you stop that!?
I wonder what happened to our stoneskin.
Looks like Imoen is best ignored and left alone.
Called it a long time ago.
As for you, my dear vampiress...
DIE!
Oh, no, no, no, no...
TAKE- Wait, did he just disappear?
That have been a Projected Image and you dispelled it.
Found the original!
We hit him with dispelling arrow, btw.
FYI, solars are now fighting each other.
Using AoE spells is TEH HARD.
Since that Irenicus you dispelled was a Projected Image, then this must be a Simulacrum... I think?
Fuck you, Irenicus! Fuck all of you!
Protection from magical weapons!? You cheap bastard!
I'll kill at least one of you!
AAAARHGHGHGHGH. MY EYES ARE BURNING WITH LAVA!
Greater malison is our bane.
Death Count: 414
Loady-load.
There were too many of them!
I know.
Once again, we skip some reptitive bits and move straight into the action. Poor hakaeshar is not doing so well in there.
PAIN!
I guess we wait now.
WTF is even going on with these solars.
Maybe they are
hardwired... to self-destruct.
Well, they're definitely fucked and shit outta luck!
See, even Imoen stopped being a Slayer fangirl hearing this song.
And now that you don't have protection any more...
Stone skin? Clever.
But not clever enough!
(Yes, we have multiple arrows of dispelling.)
I wish I remembered how we died here. Alas, I do not.
Death Count: 415
Re-load.
I feel like we're going in circles.
That is probably due to excessive use of whirlwind ability.
Hmmm...
You gave me an idea.
No more Irenicus. Oh, wait, another one appeared. A simulacrum?
Spell trigger, or a script. It will probably disappear when our time stop expires.
Well, in case it doesn't...
Alright, that's the main threat gone.
FEEDING TIME!
Yeah, go away already.
Bodhi just can't get enough of me.
I'll be right with you, dear.
Looks like she couldn't handle my masculinity.
Your turn, redskins!
How THE FUCK did that happen so fast?
Death Count: 416
Quick load.
I think we weren't hardcore enough.
What do you mean?
I mean...
...I shouldn't have...
...Even let them...
...Move!
You stopped being funny a long time ago, Bodhi.
LET THAT BE THE LAST TIME I HAVE TO KILL YOU!
Would you fuck off already?
Oh, cool, we're done with this shit.
SAVE GAME!